31 Movies of May, Day 12: Bloodsport

May 12th viewing: Bloodsport, chosen by the winner of a single-elimination full contact tournament

Year of Release: 1988

Directed by: Newt Arnold

Written by: Sheldon Lettich and Christopher Cosby & Mel Friedman

Starring: Jean-Claude Van Damme, Donald Gibb, Leah Ayres, Bolo Yeung, Norman Burton, Forest Whitaker, Roy Chiao

Accompanying Beverage of Choice: Lü (Kölsch, 9.6% ABV) - Solemn Oath Brewery, Naperville, Illinois 
(Support Independent Breweries - buy local when getting buzzed during quarantine)

This is Jean-Claude Van Damme? THIS is one of the quintessential action stars of the late 20th century?

Before this, I had never seen a single Jean-Claude Van Damme movie (save for, um, a brief voice cameo in Kung Fu Panda 2). I knew him only by reputation - he was supposed to be some badass martial artist who did lots of kicks and splits and other athletic stuff. He’s the type of guy who is supposed to wow you with his physical prowess and his skillful stunt work.

And I’m sure Van Damme really does possess a special set of skills. But I didn’t see much of them on display in Bloodsport, his leading man breakthrough and longtime cult hit.

Sure, Van Damme does the splits a good half dozen times in the movie. And boy, can he kick high. He left high kicks, right high kicks, high kicks in the air, high kicks on the ground. He’s got more kicks than a parent-approved breakfast cereal.

The problem is that all of these splits and kicks and various other stunts Van Damme performs feel like a solo demonstration at a strip mall karate studio. Ostensibly, Bloodsport relays the story of a brutal martial arts competition, featuring many of the world’s best fighters in combat with one another. But the actual combat on display just… sucks. 

Most of the battles are edited in blunt sharp cuts with obtrusive blocking, which results in viewers not seeing much of anything. At its best, the fights are composed of acrobatic flailing where neither of the participants actually look like they’re trying to land any impactful hits, much like the lightsaber duels in the Star Wars prequels. At other points, Bloodsport can’t even manage that level of energy, instead resorting to much clumsier action choreography. You’ll see Van Damme in a tight shot where he chops his arm forward, then cut to a wide shot of his opponent flailing backward. Then repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Despite starring a karate champion and rounding out much of its supporting cast with other professional fighters, the vast majority of the combat is edited as if performed by amateurs. 

It should go without saying that Bloodsport can’t really make up these action shortcomings with more traditional cinematic trappings, like acting and story. In addition to his combat chops, Van Damme might be equally well-known for his lack of dramatic ability. For that matter, the only actor here who comes across as capable of normal human speech is Forest Whitaker, which is how you can tell he was destined for greatness.

It’s honestly difficult to identify what Van Damme’s appeal is supposed to be in Bloodsport. He doesn’t get to show off any cool moves. He can’t carry the screen with charisma like contemporaries Arnold Schwarzenegger or Sylvester Stallone. And he certainly doesn’t have the actual acting chops of Bruce Willis or Kurt Russell. Ultimately, Van Damme comes off here as a failed project to create a white Bruce Lee, only the scientists in the lab focused mostly on the “white” part and not on the “good at martial arts” part. 

It’s a shame, because toward the end there are a few moments where it does feel like the filmmakers are on to a violent campy tone that really could have worked. The best comes when antagonist Chong Li, played by impressively massive Chinese bodybuilder Bolo Yeung, snaps an opponent’s leg, leading to a money shot of a fractured femur bursting out of the skin. The second comes in the next battle scene, when Van Damme wins a fight with a larger brawler by hitting him in the testicles. 

It’s my understanding that there is material out there that more properly shows off Van Damme’s real gifts. Probably with about the same low level of narrative craft, but at least some good fight scenes would be an improvement over this. Hell, Jean-Claude Van Damme just consistently punching people in the balls would be an improvement over this.